Sick
I have been constantly sick the past days. UTI and vomiting has taken its toll on me. I have lost weight. With the number of visits to the hospital, I guess I have surpassed my fear of needles/injections/IV’s/ and the like. I was so afraid of the doctor, it seems like he doesn’t know what he’s doing/saying. So afraid of the nurse coz initially, she couldn’t find any nerve to insert the IV needle in, and so a bruise on my right hand is present. We stayed for 4 hours in the hospital. JC is so kawawa, he hasn’t slept and was just on watch all the time.
I hate the part when medicine is injected through the IV tube and you can feel the medicine crawling up your arm. I hate the feeling of getting sick, of puking bile, of having an upset stomach 24/7…and I’m not even pregnant!!!! I hate the feeling of being scared not knowing what’s wrong with my own body. Hate wondering what would happen if something IS really wrong with my body and suddenly my organs stop functioning! I sometimes have these thoughts which drive me nuts!!! I just want to have a normal life, have children with JC, live a happy life..
I took prescribed antibiotics last night which once again made me feel sick. Puked once and then managed to sleep off the sick feeling. Decided that that particular antibiotic was not working properly with my system so I played doctor and took another kind of antibiotic. It didn’t make me sick but it did make me feel weak. I’m not sure though if it’s still because of the meds last night. But i have decided not to take any antibiotics anymore. I’m just gonna pray really hard that water and cranberry juice helps.
![[rainbow ocean via gatekeeper]
AmAzinG!](http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_kqecqtmutZ1qztsrto1_500.jpg)
